Quería sentir su vanidad satisfecha, y en parte ya lo había conseguido y, sin embargo, en el momento de salir del campo verde, volviéndose hacia Muñoz, súbitamente una sorda tristeza lo acongojó de pronto al ver la cara descompuesta del que había recibido sus golpes. Y supo así que la guerra no es buena, porque vencer a un hombre es tan amargo como ser vencido por él.
To act is to be committed, and to be committed is to be in danger.
To defend oneself against a fear is simply to insure that one will, one day, be conquered by it; fears must be faced. As for one´s wits, it is just not true that one can live by them- not, that is, if one wishes really to live.
To be sensual I think, is to respect and rejoice in the force of life, of life itself, and to be present in all that one does, from the effort of loving to the breaking of bread.
One can give nothing whatever without giving oneself- that is to say, risking oneself. If one cannot risk oneself, the one is simply incapable of giving. And, after all, one can give freedom only by setting someone free.
Perhaps the whole root of our trouble, the human trouble, is that we will sacrifice all the beauty of our lives, will imprison ourselves in totems, taboos, crosses, blood sacrifices, steeples, mosques, races, armies, flags, nations, in order to deny the fact of death, which is the only fact we have.
(…) Pero lo principal era que quería hablar con su hermana. Quería decirle que aquello no iba a funcionar, que ninguna novia funcionaría jamás, y que siempre iba a vivir en aquel panteón sin ventanas donde nadie le tocaba nunca la piel. Su cuerpo, le quería decir, era como una pared que rezumaba la humedad de una bodega de vinos. Respiraba el aire mohoso de las criptas. No podía estarse quieto.
I grew up in a house drawn between love and fear. There was no room for softness. But this girl with the long dreads revealed something else- that love could be soft and understanding; that, soft or hard, love was an act of heroism.
So you must wake up every morning knowing that no promise is unbreakable, least of all the promise of waking up at all. This is not despair. There are the preferences of the universe itself: verbs over nouns, actions over states, struggle over hope.
“You exist. You matter. You have value. You have every right to wear your hoodie, to play your music as loud as you want. You have every right to be you. And no one should deter you from being you. You have to be you. And you can never be afraid to be you.”
Pero hay algo poderoso en darse cuenta de que has estado vendiéndote por debajo de lo que vales, de que por alguna razón tu cerebro confundía la falta de esfuerzo con la incapacidad. Ésta es la razón por la que, cuando la gente me pregunta qué es lo que más me gustaría cambiar en la clase trabajadora blanca, digo: “La sensación de que nuestras decisiones no tienen importancia”.
“Owning our story and loving ourselves through that process is the bravest thing we´ll ever do.” I still believe in this quote from two of my previous books-maybe now more than ever. But I know that it takes more than courage to own your story. We own our stories so we don´t spend our lives being defined by them or denying them. And while the journey is long and difficult at times, it is the path to living a more wholehearted life.
Just because someone isn´t willing or able to love us, it doesn´t mean that we are unlovable.
Setting boundaries means getting clear on what behaviors are okay and what´s not okay. Integrity is key to this commitment because it´s how we set thouse boundaries and ultimately hold ourselves and others accountable for respecting them. I tried to find an existing definition of integrity that reflected what I saw in the data, but I couldn´t. So here´s my definition:
Integrity is choosing courage over comfort; choosing what is right over what is fun, fast, or easy; and choosing to practice our values rather than simply professing them.
Longing is not conscious wanting; it´s an involuntary yearning for wholeness, for understanding, for meaning, for the opportunity to regain or even simply touch what we´ve lost. Longing is a vital and important part of grief, yet many of us feel we need to keep our longings to ourselves for fear we will be misunderstood, perceived as engaging in magical or unrealistic thinking, or lacking in fortitude and resilience.
Regret is what taught me that living outside of my values is not tenable for me. Regrets about not taking chances have made me braver. Regrets about shaming or blaming people I care about have made me more thoughtful. Sometimes the most uncomfortable learning is the most powerful.
Revolution might sound a little dramatic, but in this world, choosing authenticity and worthiness is an absolute act of resistance. Choosing to live and love with our whole hearts is an act of defiance. You´re going to confuse, piss off, and terrify lots of people -including yourself. One minute you´ll pray that the transformation stops, and the next minute you´ll pray that it never ends. You´ll also wonder how you can feel so brave and so afraid at the same time. At least that´s how I feel most of the time… brave, afraid, and very, very alive.
He aquí lo que dijo Hölderlin en una carta a Schiller: “Siempre estaba tentado por verlo y no lo veía por sentir que yo, para usted, no podía ser nada”. Y en otro pasaje: “Mientras estaba frente a usted, mi corazón se reducía a casi nada, y cuando ya había tomado coraje, no podía contener la agitación”.
Mishima a Kawabata, 3 de Marzo de 1946